BDSM/Kink/Extreme

[-J-]

I'm totally in agreement. There's no law that says you have to be Christian Grey as a dom, and thank god for that! That's not to say there's anything wrong with being a cold taskmaster if you're into that, but there are plenty of different types of doms -- the primal beast, the stern educator, or even a psychotic sadist -- not to mention combinations of those and other personalities. The same is true for subs. Some are excessively enthusiastic about serving, others not so much. And everyone has their preferences, leading to all kinds of different combinations. Humor or even just outright silliness has its place for sure.

I'm also a big believer in aftercare, even if it's just an exchange of "I had a great time, hope you liked it too" / "Yeah I did, thanks! Bye!" at the end. I was talking with a partner about this not too long ago: Even though there's no physical harm being done in a virtual world (except in some very unusual situations), there's this surge of adrenaline and endorphins and all manner of neurochemicals that comes with the rush of emotions in BDSM. That neuropsychological mix can change in a hurry outside the heat of the moment. Making sure someone's okay outside of a scene as just as important as meeting their needs within it. Because in the end, there's still a real person when the persona in a fantasy world is no longer needed, and that person has needs too.